ABOUT THE BOOK
Even after forty years working in mental health, nothing could have prepared me for the pain of losing my husband.
Like me, he was a mental health nurse. We met in the secure wards of Rampton Hospital in England, where humour was often the only light in dark places. Together we created a life anchored in family and love, bound by our shared passion for travel, motorbike riding, and a deep empathy for the struggles of the human mind.
Life wasn’t supposed to be like this. We had a future mapped out — one that was suddenly ripped away. When his suicide attempt went dreadfully wrong, everything I thought I knew about grief and healing was tested. I couldn’t even begin to mourn him properly amid the fallout and the accusations that followed.
This is a story of us — of our life together, and of what comes after. A journey through shock, truth, and rebuilding — through tears, guilt, and humiliation — and the unexpected strength found in the support of amazing friends. Out of this, friendships were forged and strengthened, and slowly, healing and hope began to return.
Useful Phone Numbers
Lifeline – 13 11 14 (24 hours, 7 days), for emotional crisis & suicide prevention.
Beyond Blue – 1300 22 4636, for anxiety, depression and general mental-health support.
Suicide Call Back Service – 1300 659 467, for people affected by suicide or contemplating it.
Kids Helpline – 1800 55 1800, for young people aged 5-25 (also online chat).
MensLine Australia – 1300 789 978, for men seeking telephone or online counselling.
13YARN – 13 92 76, for Aboriginal & Torres Strait Islander peoples.
Qlife (for LGBTIQ + people) – 1800 184 527.
Medicare Mental HEalth – 1800 575 212, a starting point for navigating mental-health services.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Jacqueline Smith
The author has spent more than forty years working in mental health, first in the UK and later in South Australia, where she now lives. She met her husband while working at Rampton Hospital in England, and together they shared a love of travel, motorbike riding, and a lifelong commitment to helping others through their work in mental health.
After the tragic loss of her husband, she began writing as a way to make sense of grief, love, and the courage it takes to rebuild a life. Her writing reflects both her professional insight and her deeply personal journey toward understanding, healing, and hope. This is her first book.
